Empress Nueva of Jurai
by Andrew Joshua Talon
Summary: Happy Birthday, Nuevachan! This is for you!  Features appearances by Tsunami TM!, Usagi SM, Megumi OMG!, Keitaro, Shinobu LH and Akane R12 Plus Talon thinking he's Magical Girl Adorable Andrea after getting hit in the head...R&R, please!


***Empress Nueva of Jurai***  
  
Andrew Joshua Talon  
  
DISCLAIMER: Nyah!  
  
******  
  
The sound of gunfire exploded through the streets of the small warehouse district, bursts of fire announcing the launching of the projectiles. Gunfire was never the cute little pops you heard on TV, no way. A small, high-yeild chemical explosive went off every time the trigger was pulled, making it sound like thunder shocks from a particularily angry storm.  
  
Nueva Yui Maxwell tried to breathe as normally as possible as she ran, adrenaline super-charging her body as the fight-or-flight mode took over. A bullet buzzed her ear, barely two inches from making contact. She ran faster, keeping her head down.  
  
She counted two guys with her periphrial vision, both armed with semi-automatics. She couldn't make out much in the detail department, they seemed to be wearing masks of the creepy ghost stalker kind.  
  
"Great. What is this, 'Scream 3 1/2?" Nueva muttered as she tripped slightly but managed to keep her balance. The guys actually seemed to be purposely MISSING her. Herding her into an ambush, no doubt, she thought bitterly.  
  
Nueva took a turn around one of the silent warehouses, took another, and ran as fast as she possibly could. She could see the subtle glint of the waterfront ahead. She cursed- She was probably screwed.  
  
"MISS NUEVA!" Someone shouted behind her. Nueva kept running, but managed to get a look behind herself. It had been one of the guys chasing her. Oh yeah, she was REALLY going to stop and chat.  
  
"MISS NEUVA! PLEASE STOP!"   
  
"LIKE HELL I WILL!" Nueva noticed the water rapidly approaching. She checked around her. The buildings closed her in-Trapped. She had been right, but of course it didn't do any real good. She couldn't jump into the water- She'd be easily hit and/or caught. Well, she thought glumy, she was screwed. Baka!  
  
That's probably what'd be written on her tombstone, baka! Well, that was provided she got one. She stopped, spun around and glared in abject defiance. The two men came to a stop and studied her. Nueva studied them right back. One was rather lanky and skinny, like a green beanstalk. THe other was a complete contrast. Short, fat, and dumpy in all his entireity, a bowling ball of a man. Nueva blinked. THey were both dressed in black, with those ghost masks popular with psycho killers in horror movies.  
  
"... Kami-sama, you guys are so cliche," Nueva shook her head at the ludicrousity of the whole thing. The two men raised their guns and prepared to fire. Nueva closed er eyes and sighed. It was some sort of shock she'd gone into, or maybe the better term was fatalism? Either way, she didn't really care.  
  
No... What was she saying? Two bimbo Halloween bastards had chased her down, shot at her, for no fucking reason at all, and NOW SHE WAS GOING TO DIE?! Nueva was pissed. Nueva felt like charging at them and ripping their fucking throats out! She snarled, and felt somethin odd. Her hair stood on end, and a wave of warmth washed over her body.  
  
BOOM! BOOM! BOOM! BOOM! BOOM!  
  
FWIK! FWIK! FWIK! FWIK! FWIK! Nueva opened her eyes. Both men were staring at her in amazement. Nueva promptly went ker-blinkies.  
  
"Are you guys the worst shots in the Universe? I mean, c'mon man! I'm...right... here?" Nueva had noticed her appearance. Her long red hair had turned a greenish-silver, and she was now clothed in an elegant blue, tan and white kimono. She quickly checked her appearance in the water behind her. Her irises had turned a dark scarlet, and two black stripes now adorned her cheeks. She blinked, then turned back at the two men.  
  
"It's her, just as da boss said!" Stated the short, stout one. He pulled of his mask, revealing a rosy, chubby face full of mirth and humor. The tall lanky one followed suit, a thin, pleasant face being revealed. Both were brunnettes, the lanky one of Asianic origin while the stout one apparently a Caucasian from New York.  
  
"Our 'pologies, Miss Nueva. We was told that yous had a power, and our boss said to test it. We meant no harm, ma'am, honest. We are here to present yous with a invitation. Shou?" Shou cleared his throat, and pulled out an envelope. Opening it, he began to read it with a mellow-dramatic flair.  
  
"You are cordially invited, Miss Yui Maxwell, to a meeting of the "Recently Found Members of the Jurian Royal Family Group". It is requested you attend in your battle gear (as you are now, FYI), to meet and learn of you true origins. Is this satisfactory, Miss Yui Maxwell?"  
  
WHUMP!  
  
"... Man, dat's gotta hoit."  
  
************  
  
Nueva groaned, then slowly opened her eyes. Fainting onto a hard, cold dock was never enjoyable, she decided. She was momentarily blinded, but her eyes swiftly adjusted...  
  
Allowing her to see two forest green eyes staring right back at her.  
  
"WAH!" Nueva instinctively flared her aura, sending out a wave of energy that blasted whomever had been standing over her into the ceiling, then crashing back down into the floor.  
  
"...Itai..." Said a small, weak voice that Nueva instantly recognized. She leapt off the couch (taking a moment to appreciate the familiar setting of Taro MD's living room) and went to the side of the swirly-eyed author.  
  
"Talon? Talon, you okay? Say something!" Nueva got a chance to study Talon more closely. It appeared that he'd dyed his hair a dark black with a pronounced blue sheen to it. His glasses had disappeared, and he possessed the same "tiger stripes" on his cheeks as she did. He was also dressed in Jurian battle armor, the armor-over-a-baggy-temple-jumpsuit-kind. The jumpsuit was, per the standard, a crisp white color. Along with black, fingerless gloves with matching gauntlets, black footings, and nearly-all black armored tunic to finish it off. He also had the traditional head-band with two silver bar thingies hanging from it.   
  
"Who's Talon? I am Magical Girl Adorable Andrea!" Talon giggled like a blonde cheerleader stereotype out of a bad teen movie, obviously still dazed. Nueva sweatdropped.  
  
A graceful woman, with long azure hair, pinkish eyes, and dressed in long white robes floated into the room, smiling.  
  
"I see you two have met, correct?" Nueva stared at Tsunami, Patron Goddess of Jurai, with a blank stare.  
  
"Um... Yes?"  
  
"That's good. Please, won't you join the rest of us in the concert hall?" Nueva nodded dumbly, and followed, dragging Talon along who was babbling something along the lines of,"Adorable Mutation, MAGICAL RECALL!"   
  
Nueva entered, then promptly gaped.   
  
It looked like an Anime Convention reduced proportionately to one thousandth normal size. Keitaro Urashima was there, apparently having transformed into blue-tinted Jurian armor. His hair had turned silvery blue and his glasses were also gone. Nueva had to admit Keitaro really was a hottie like that. Akane, Shinobu, and about two dozen other anime characters of non-Tenchi Muyo! origin were clustered about a buffet table, talking in various colors of Jurian armor. No one else possessed the Achika-Style battle kimono like her. Tsunami cleared her throat, and abruptly the backround warbling stopped. Tsunami smiled at them all.  
  
"THank you for coming tonight, all of you. As you have been informed, you are all members of the Jurian Royal Family. Most of you arrived here on Earth as infants or toddlers, as a result of an evacuation carried out during Ryoko's assault on Jurai herself. Some of you arrived for hiding by your parents, who were political dissidents during the Reign of Terror."  
  
"Reign of Terror?" Asked Megumi from Oh My Goddess! Tsunami nodded.  
  
"Yes. The Emperor before Azuza abused his power and killed thousands before he was stopped. The Reign of Terror, as that was his name." Everyone sweatdropped.  
  
"Earth is a small, out of the way little planet that few pay attention to in the Galactic Union. Thus, it is the perfect hideway for those wishing to disappear. You all were hidden here, raised by Earth parents, and still all the while maintaining a sub-space link to the Jurian trees, thus allowing you to transform."  
  
"So... Do any of us have a claim to the throne?" Inquired Usagi from Sailor Moon. Tsunami smiled benevolently.  
  
"Only one person here possesses that claim; Nueva Yui Maxwell, the Fanfiction writer." Everyone turned and stared at her. Nueva blinked, then smiled nervously.  
  
"Um... Eh heh heh... How?"  
  
"Your battle armor is the Goddess Variety, which means you have a direct link with myself, which means that you are part of Emperor Azuza's immediate family, meaning that you do indeed possess a claim to the Jurian throne. Isn't that lovely? You could become the twenty-second and a half Empress of Jurai!" Nueva blinked.  
  
"Twenty-second and a half?"  
  
"The last empress got sliced in two by a stray Light Hawk Wing." Every sweatdropped.  
  
"I see..."  
  
"So, all that remains is... HAPPY BIRTHDAY NUEVA!"  
  
"WAH?!"  
  
THUD! Nueva groaned, and felt the hardwood floor of her bedroom below her. She heard some snickers and giggles from beyond her bedsheets which were covering her head. She lifted up the covers.  
  
Talon, Taro MD, Tori Yuki Ichimura, Rona, Lady Lye, Cherry Blossom, Iruka Yuywell, Jenn, and a number of other fanfiction authors/esses stood in the doorway, Talon and Tori holding a large cake alit with candles. Nueva giggled softly as she struggled to get to her feet.  
  
"Thanks."  
  
"Hey your Majesty, what're friends for?"  
  
WHUMP!  
  
"... Talon-kun, I think you killed her."  
  
"WHAT?! What'd I do?!"  
  
"You made her faint, dumkopf!"  
  
"I did not! She fainted on her own!"  
  
"SOMEBODY GET SOME WATER!"  
  
"Well... We could always try CPR on her..."  
  
"Shut up, Taro."  
  
*********  
  
And there you have it! Happy Birthday, Nueva-chan! A cute, short, weird and pointless little fic in your honor! (I'm sure you feel so proud ~_^ ) R&R, please!  
  
  
  
  
BTW, I'M SUFFERING FROM INTENSE WRITER'S BLOCK! HELP, SOMEONE!  
GIVE ME A FRICKING CHALLENGE! Well, if you please... 


End file.
